Saturday, September 11, 2004


Just had another debate with a married man (won't say cousin ;) about the different lives that he & his wife lead. He was confessing that he has a place of his own because he needs solitude and he wants to party. Yet he tells me that his house is built to enable solitude and the best parties, but that his wife is not part of that life because she is conservative! So i asked him when did we become that society where the husband and wife have different lives? I have pictures of mom & dad partying together, so why do younger generations acquire this separate life credo? I asked him why did you marry her if she is too conservative for you? His answer: to many whys now.

Ok this is what i see the problem is: compatibility in marriage is too simplified to "good girl/guy, right family". This is not bad, but whats missing is what are the indivual compatibilities of the couple? What kind of life will they have together? Will they agree to raise their children in a certain way(s)? In the "olden" days the woman would follow the man's life style, he would make the decisions for the entire family and that would be that, but not anymore.

Marriage, such an ancient institution, what is the use of it today anyways? if you can live two lives, yet be considered by others are married, what is the point?

as for your cousin, maybe he wanted to have the conservative one for the house, and others for his normal life, a.k.a tony your favorite chubby sex god :P
I agree purg, there are men & women who get married with the intention of having 2 different lives, therefore compatibility need not be inspected; however, the result is emptiness which then breeds resent. The recurrent thought would be "i am sharing my life with someone who doesn't care about me". Tony Soprano is very lucky because his wife loved & cared about him, she's an old school catholic woman too. However, i don't think that neither man or women can handle different lives in the long run. Emptiness breeds resent, resent breads unhappiness, unhappiness breads depression, and there goes the entire family, kids and all. So my advise would be to the guys out there: If you're planning to party on, make sure you choose a partner that would and could enjoy that life style with you and i have seen such couples, they're everyone's envy. And if you're planning to spend every national and religious holiday in Mecca then make sure your partner will appreciate that too.
I am catholic according to some people
Trophy Wife Sheba..
Sheba, yibteeha 3adel !
I loved this post and what you commented... you were right on!

What you said is soo true, a guy has to choose a girl that fits into his lifestyle and vice versa.
My Dear Plushness,
its b-coz the woman IS the man in ALL MARRIAGES
My Dear Plushness,
ur words were music to my ears, but the saying goes " opposites attract" and then u r stuck with that attraction. cant change a single thing. loool what just came to mind is " if u cant beat them, then u might aswell join them "
ifffff i hate this women/men topics, it makes me HATE them even more !!!!!
What happened to college and your younger years where you could party all you wanted... FFS if you want to get married plus party you can just sit on a pole. Marriage is one hell of a different world than what most ppl expect
Our destiny is in our hands, its what we make it to be up to a large extent.
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