Saturday, December 04, 2004

Inspired by Break Up Babe

Its getting more and more difficult writing here, for many reasons but mainly its because the events or people i want to express my grief about are part of this community, even if from a distance.

My consolation is a blogger, very far away from here going through very similar angst and situations. She is Breakup Babe breakupbabe.blogspot.com, a young intelligent, passionate woman very much worth more than just your tea break browsing.

This is what i wrote her as one of my comments & i've decided that it will do for my entry today:

'Its scary what rituals we (single yet hopeful girls) arrive at simultaneously in faith of a relationship to work, to not jinks it, to keep it.

I make a resolution to not speak of a possible love or a heart break every time, but i also break it every time. I know that if its right its right and nothing would change that, but i cannot help blaming luck or the stars or even PMS for my too many heart aches. And you know what, they don't get easier, but i have to admit i find new tricks of making the pain go away faster.'

I wish i can link her post to this so that you can read her post, but i will copy what i was commenting on & i hope she doesn't mind, its from her entry of October 15th http://breakupbabe.blogspot.com/2004_10_01_breakupbabe_archive.html:

'There is a love interest lurking behind the scenes, but I can’t even write about him, for fear that if I do, he will instantly disappear. So that’s what I will do now too, since I can’t seem to come up with a single clever thing to say.'

I urge everyone to read BBs blog, she has been signed on to write a book!


Comments:
Dearest Sheba,

Why can't we talk and scream and cry and express our feelings about our break ups ? Our Heartaches ? Our Pain ? Why is it that women are always expected to hold the fort, Stand straight with a stiff upper lip, keep things together ?

Dammit, Express those feelings, let them out, talk about "him", cry over "him"! If he was worth you investing your precious time and part of your life in, then Isn't it logical to mourn that loss ???

And with all mourning, the time it takes to get over it varies. It takes some two weeks, some a year, it all depends. The most important part is that you actually get over it completely.

Only when you have closure, and have relived it in depth, can you identify what went wrong and how to remedy it.

And Yes... if there is a love interest lurking about, you do develop that fear that you might jinx it if you do talk about it. The thing to consider here though, is maybe when you do talk about it doesn't that shed a new light on it ? When you talk about something instead of bottling it up as a fantasy, you get a different perspective, that helps you see more clearly and enables you to judge the situation better.

In the end, I know nothing, because I literally bottle everything inside and then explode like a nuclear bomb at the most inopportune moment.

Yep, C'est moi, PSS, the Nuclear Bomb :)
 
Indeed, talking about things gives you a different perspective. People get paid hundreds for that job!
 
I skim a lot of blogs, and so far yours is in the Top 3 of my list of favorites. I'm going to dive in and try my hand at it, so wish me luck.

It'll be in a totally different area than yours (mine is about penis enlargement reviews) I know, it sounds strange, but it's like anything, once you learn more about it, it's pretty cool. It's mostly about penis enlargement reviews related articles and subjects.
 
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