Plushness

It was 10 am and Faisal had not called nor text-messaged her, which was unusual for him. The night before, he lead their conversation into future plans, the number of children he would like to have with her and what he would like to name them. Lama was on the receiving end, and did not participate much, partly because he took her by surprise, and partly because she did not feel they were ready to talk about such details.

Later in the afternoon Faisal called her, and seemed preoccupied, and he did not make any plans with Lama, nor did he ask about her plans, as he would normally have done. She did not ask either, but she felt something was different.

She went shopping with a friend and his call came again.

Faisal: What are you up to?
Lama (knowing he wanted to see her): I’m shopping with Basma at Marina mall.
Faisal: You wanna have dinner with me?
Lama: sure

At dinner, there was something in his eyes that was there a day before. He couldn’t hide it, and she could see it and feel it.

On their way to their cars, she stopped him so she could look into his eyes. She could still see what she saw and felt earlier and she decided to ask him..

Lama: Whats wrong sweetie.
Faisal: Nothing, I’m okay.
Lama: I can see something different.
Faisal (pausing and suddenly not looking at her anymore): I want to be honest with you. I... I’m not sure what I want.
Lama: You mean you’re not sure if you want this relationship?
Faisal: Yes.
Lama: Or are you not sure about me?
Faisal: That too.
Lama: Oh.

She got into her car. Did not look back. Numbness took over her body and mind.